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My Valentine’s wish for you is that you are appreciated in the manner you like. Not everyone likes chocolates, or flowers, or a massage. This gummy heart is a reminder that simple can be best.

According to Gallup, 70% of workers don’t receive any appreciation at work. And when we spend more hours at work than home in many cases, that is hugely significant. What would happen to your relationships at home if you neglected to show appreciation to your spouse, significant other, kids or parents? You would be in the dog house for sure.

According to Gary Chapman, author of the best- selling book, “5 Love Languages”, workers do not get enough appreciation, so he wrote “The Five Languages of Appreciation in the workplace.” This book will give you the tools to bolster morale, increase commitment and engagement. It teaches you how to communicate authentically that you value people for their effort and results.Another point is that authentic includes doing it in the way the person wants it. Wait a minute! Shouldn’t they just receive my chocolates or “Atta-boy” gracefully? No, they don’t. Your attempts to appreciate may fall flat on the recipient due to it feeling inauthentic, late, out of proportion or mismatched to what they really value. They may value a day off, not a bouquet of flowers, more time with you in the trenches with them solving problems, or maybe they want a chance to socialize with their coworkers over pizza. It is critical to match how you demonstrate appreciation with the type of “love” that person or team you are bestowing it upon, needs.

Some don’t want trinkets and gifts. Others appreciate a thoughtful note, or that you remembered a hobby or interest they have, or a gift card to their favorite restaurant. Some want words. Others want “thank you” in public, some want it privately. Bottom line, you must learn the communication style of your people and give it to them the way they like it.

So this Valentine’s Day, learn how to give appreciation the way your people really prefer it. I’ll take the dark chocolates and a great pinot.


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